Not too long ago I wrote an article titled The New Alphabet of
Manliness
, where I
had a little fun and came up with an unofficial "alphabet" geared
towards the fitness industry. Included were many of the terms,
phrases, concepts, and miscellaneous tidbits that many newbies (and
veterans) come across but may not fully understand.

It turned out to be one of my more popular articles. Like any
great literary achievement, I figured it deserved a second
edition.

It's time to relearn your ABCs.

A is for Asymmetry

In his book, Athletic Body in Balance, Gray Cook states
that there's no clear evidence linking tightness or weakness of a
particular muscle group with injury. But instead, a significant
amount of injuries were noted in those with right-left strength
and/or flexibility imbalances (asymmetries). To be a bit more
specific, Cook goes on to say that any imbalance of over 15% would
predispose many trainees to future injury.

This is why we include single-leg triple jumps in our initial
evaluations with athletes. If we see a huge gap in total distance
between their left and right side, we know there's an asymmetry
that needs to be fixed pronto.

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Another great example would be when we test a trainee's
hamstring flexibility. If there's a major difference between their
right and left side, we have some corrective work to
do.

hamstring flexibility
hamstring flexibility

In a nutshell, fix the asymmetry and more often than not
"issues" such as knee pain, lower back pain, and/or shoulder
impingement tend to clear themselves up.

B is for Branched Chain Amino Acids

The branched chain amino acids (BCAA's) consist of the essential
amino acids leucine, isoleucine, and valine and receive their name
due to their branching chemical structure. BCAA's are important
for the strength athlete because it's been shown they have a direct
link to protein synthesis, with leucine being the main factor.

Additionally, for endurance athletes BCAA's are important due to
the fact that most don't consume nearly enough protein in their
daily diet. It's been shown that prolonged endurance activity
causes a sharp decrease in BCAA levels which can affect immune
function and performance (obviously).

Whether or not you need to think about supplementing with BCAA's
depends on a few factors: training intensity, type of training,
overall dietary protein intake, dieting factors, etc. The research
behind their efficacy is sound and they're one of the few
supplements that I've no issues recommending.

C is for Cressey Performance

Very few people are lucky enough to train at a facility that's
designed by athletes for athletes, and for those who couldn't care
less that there's only one treadmill. Similarly, not many people
are fortunate enough to actually work at such a
place.

At Cressey Performance, located in Hudson and Framingham, MA,
we've gone out of our way to create an environment that combines
just the right mix of science and attitude to help all of our
clients attain their goals. Matter of fact, I've made a list that
differentiates us from most gyms:

Most Gyms

Cressey Performance

Consider a Smith machine a staple piece of
equipment.

Three power racks, a glute-ham raise, 35-yard sprint track, a
plethora of specialty bars, and chalk use isn't only allowed, it's
encouraged.

Hire trainers who feel squats are dangerous and that leg presses
are a safer option.

We're the guys who end up fixing those people who go to shitty
trainers.

Cell phones are allowed on the fitness floor.

Unless they're talking to Jessica Biel, athletes seen with their
cell phone are promptly "punished" by pushing the sled till they
can't feel their legs.

Have some trainers who don't even look like they lift
weights.

Every current employee can deadlift over 400 pounds, including
the operations manager. Additionally all sorts of tomfoolery takes
place, such as EC doing a 50 inch box jump on a whim. (Video
below.)

Have XM radio.

We've made certain that the likes of John Mayer or Celine Dion
will never be heard on the stereo.

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Check out the website at CresseyPerformance.com.

D is for Dynamic Effort Method

The dynamic effort (DE) method is one of three ways (the other
two being the maximal effort and repetition method) to develop
muscular force, and as a result, strength. One of the best, and
coincidentally one of the least utilized, ways to get stronger is
to get faster. By utilizing the dynamic effort method,
you're teaching yourself to explodethrough those sticking
points that serve as obstacles in your pursuit of
progress.

The dynamic effort method is generally used for the "big three"
movements (squat, bench press, and deadlift) using loads of 50 to
70% of your one-repetition maximum (1RM). On any given week, one
training session would begin with a DE bench variation, and another
would start with a DE squat/deadlift variation.

Bench

For example:

Bench press 1RM = 250 pounds

Week 1 (50%): 6 sets of 3 reps at 125 pounds
Week 2 (55%): 6 sets of 3 reps at 140 pounds (rounded up)
Week 3 (60%): 8 sets of 3 reps at 150 pounds
Week 4 (65%): 4 sets of 3 reps at 165 pounds (rounded up). It's
also not a bad idea to test for new personal records this week.
Week 5: Start over again using new percentages.

It's important to realize that these are just estimates. The
real key is to pay attention to the bar speed throughout your sets.
If the bar slows down, then the weight being used is too heavy. If
your bar speed is consistent, then you're right on track.

Everyone needs to learn to be fast. However, this doesn't mean
that if your max bench is 135 pounds that you need to be concerned
with implementing DE work. If you're a beginner, explosive push-ups
and medicine ball circuits would be just as effective. In the
meantime, get stronger by getting your reps in.

E is for Eat Your (Saturated) Fat

Fat, specifically saturated fat, has long been the evil step
sister of the dietary world. Thankfully we have people like Jeff
Volek, author of the TNT Diet ,
to help dispel many of these common myths.

Steak

1. Replacing carbohydrates with saturated fats – or any
type of fat, except trans fats – results in decreased
triglycerides levels, an independent risk factor for heart
disease

2. Replacing carbohydrates with saturated fat – or again,
any type of fat – results in increased HDL cholesterol levels
(that's the good stuff). In fact, saturated fat raises HDL even more than unsaturated fat.

3. Saturated fat increases the size of LDL (bad cholesterol)
particles, which are less atherogenic.

4. Not all saturated fats raise cholesterol. For instance,
stearic acid, a type of saturated fatty acid found in meats, has a
neutral effect on LDL cholesterol.

And speaking of all of those delicious furry animals you eat,
let's take a closer look at the fatty acid content of a sirloin
steak and how it impacts your heart health.

Monounsaturated Fat: 49%

Saturated Fat: 47%

Polyunsaturated Fat: 4%

Oleic acid: 45% [+]
Palmitic acid [+]

Palmitic acid: 27% [+]
Stearic acid: 16% [0]
Myristic acid: 3% [-]
Lauric acid: 1% [+]

Linoleic acid: 4% [+]

Key: + = positive effect on cholesterol; - =
negative effect on cholesterol; 0 = no effect on
cholesterol

As you can see, steak isn't quite the artery clogger many
doctors claim it is. Dr. Volek goes so far as to say that including
more saturated fat, while reducing processed carbohydrates/sugar,
in your diet will help reduce your risk of heart disease.
How do you like dem apples?

F is for Force Couples

Force couples are muscles that work synergistically to provide
equal and optimal forces around the joint during any movement. When
one's force couples are out of whack, we often see kinetic
dysfunctions throughout the body.

One perfect example of an altered force couple would be a
posterior pelvic tilt (PPT) due to a prolonged seated posture.

Force Couples Force Couples

In this scenario, we have a predictive pattern of weak/inhibited
muscles and tight/overactive muscles.

Weak/Inhibited

Tight/Overactive

Psoas
Rectus femoris
Tensor fasciae latae
Spinal erectors

Rectus abdominus
External obliques
Gluteals
Hamstrings

This posture is seen most often in those who spend many hours in
front of the computer. Posterior tilting of the pelvis leads to
altered recruitment strategies and decreased ability to control
forces through the entire lumbo-pelvic-hip region. This amounts to
a decreased function of the kinetic chain.

Additionally, as Mike Robertson noted in his article Hips Don't
Lie: Fixing Your Force Couples, PPT
often leads to flattening of the lumbar spine which typically leads
to an increased kyphotic (or slouched upper back) and head forward
posture. Excessive kyphosis isn't a good thing if you value your
rotator cuff health, and head forward posture puts you at an
increased risk for neck pain, as well as cervical disc herniations.
Translation: Girls will not want to hang out with
you.

How to fix it: Generally speaking, you want to strengthen what's
weak/inhibited and stretch what's tight/overactive (hint: read
Mike's article). Also, scroll down to "P" for a hot tip on psoas
activation.

G is for Giant Cambered Bar

Whether a client has a bum knee, shoulder, or ego, it's my job
as a strength coach and personal trainer to give them a training
effect each and every time they walk into my facility. One prime
example would be squatting with a straight bar. Because of the "at
risk" position (abduction and external rotation) of the shoulder
joint, squatting tends to be very uncomfortable for some trainees.
This is especially true if they're dealing with current shoulder
pathology.

One of the most valuable pieces of equipment for those with bum
shoulders is the giant cambered bar. Here a trainee is still able
to perform squats, good mornings (I lovecambered bar good
mornings), etc., without worrying about whether or not their
shoulders will hate them the next day.

Giant Cambered Bar

H is for Hip Swings (AKA Leg Swings)

One of the very first things I test when evaluating a new
athlete is their ankle mobility. More often than not, it's less
than spectacular and often explains many dysfunctions up the
kinetic chain. A prime example would be many pitchers who have a
history of pain in their throwing shoulder. Almost without fail,
their ankle mobility stinks, especially in their opposite side
ankle.

Nonetheless, given the fact that many athletes tape up their
ankles and wear shoes that provide a lot of stability to a joint
that normally prefers to be mobile, it's no wonder we have an
epidemic of high ankle sprains and anterior knee
pain.

Luckily, improving one's ankle mobility is a rather simple task.
We've all seen or read about various ankle mobility drills here on Testosterone.

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Another simple way is to use something that I learned from Mike
Boyle involving leg swings.

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While leg swings are generally thought of as a "hip mobility"
drill, they also serve as a superb ankle mobility exercise in the
sense that they drive transverse (rotational) motion into the ankle
of the plant leg. For clients who really need to work on
their ankle mobility, I like to include sets of both variations
throughout the week. One of the best ways to "sneak" them into
their training session is to throw them in while they're resting
between sets. Instead of just sitting there twiddling their thumbs,
they can do something productive.

I is for I Heart Matt Damon

There's nothing more manly then admitting when you have a
man-crush on someone. In my case, it's Matt Damon.

What's not to love about Matt Damon? He was voted People
Magazine's
"Sexiest Man Alive" (take that, Pitt). He's in one
of the most re-watchable movies of all time, Good Will
Hunting
(honorable mention: The Departed). And he plays
the most bad ass character this side of Beatrix Kiddo, in Jason
Bourne.

Matt Damon

I'd like to think that Matt and I could be best friends forever
if we were to ever hang out. There are lots of things we could do
together. For instance, we could totally train together and grab a
bite to eat afterwards. Maybe play a little pick-up basketball, or
give each other high fives for being so damn awesome. You know,
stuff like that.

Honorable mentions:

Christian Bale
Dwayne 'The Rock" Johnson
Brawny Smurf

J is for Just Stand Up

I'm going to keep this brief and give you one piece of advice
that'll undoubtedly help you make better gains with your physique.
If you're like most people, you sit commuting to work each day, you
sit in front of a computer from nine to five, and then you sit some
more watching hours of television every night. Why on Earth would
you want to go to the gym and spend more time on your
ass?

I'm dumbfounded when I walk into gyms and see people sitting
throughout the majority of their training sessions. Get off the
bike, the seated military press, and the seated upright abdominal
machine for Pete's sake. Do yourself a favor and stand up!

K is for Kate Beckinsale

It's been shown in numerous studies* that merely looking at a
picture of Kate Beckinsale will increase Testosterone levels by
317%.

Kate Beckinsale

* N = 1 (me)

L is for Low Back Killers

It's been said that upwards of 80% of the population will at
some point in time experience low back pain. Many people will blame
a one-time only "blunt trauma" as the cause of their lower back
pain, like last weekend when you fell off the ladder finally
hauling that bastard Rudolf from the roof. But in most cases it can
be attributed to what's called cumulative repetitive stress or
load.

According to Dr. Stuart McGill, lower back injuries are more
common during occupational and athletic endeavors that involve
cumulative trauma from repetitive sub-failure magnitude
loads.

In such cases, injury is the result of accumulated trauma
produced by either the repeated application of relatively low load
(such as a rower who repeatedly loads the tissues of the lower
back) or the application of a sustained load for a long duration
(the "computer guy" who sits at his desk all day with atrocious
posture).

So the next time you overhear someone blabbering about how they
hurt their back while deadlifting, and as a result have gone on a
crusade to deem them "bad" for everyone, mention to them that their
form stinks and they should be a bit more cognizant of their
posture the other 23 hours of the day. Those are the real back
killers.

M is for My New Favorite Snack

One of the most underrated foods out there is pumpkin. Not only
is it a great source of beta carotene (which is converted to
vitamin A, a powerful antioxidant), but it's also chock-full of
fiber and serves as a great low sugar/low calorie snack.

Pumpkin

Here's a simple snack idea that I stole from nutritionist Mike
Roussell:

1/2 cup canned pumpkin (just regular canned pumpkin, not the
pumpkin pie mix)

1/2 cup low-fat cottage cheese

1 scoop of vanilla Metabolic Drive (to sweeten up
the pumpkin)

A dash or two of cinnamon

Handful of chopped walnuts

Scrumptiously-delicious.

N is for Nocturnal Feedings

Raise your hand if this sounds vaguely familiar: "Dude, I eat
all day and I still can't put on any weight." I hear it so
much that it haunts me in my sleep.

Nocturnal Feedings

One easy solution that I like to use with clients who have a
hard time putting on, and keeping, weight is the concept of
nocturnal feedings. Simply put, it's an approach that'll allow you
to get a few more calories in during a 24-hour
period.

I've heard stories of guys setting their alarm to wake
themselves up to eat in the middle of the night. Don't do that.
Disrupting your body's natural circadian rhythm by abruptly waking
yourself up will do more harm than good in the long run.

Nocturnal Feedings

Instead, drink a large glass of water before bed. As a result,
your body will wake you up naturally to go to the bathroom. On your
way back to bed, you can down the protein shake that you
conveniently left on the nightstand before you fell asleep. And no,
your girlfriend doesn't want to have sex with you right now.
Especially once she finds out you totally missed the toilet...
again.

O is for Oblique Chain (AKA Posterior Oblique
Chain)

Optimal function requires the ability to effectively transfer
force through the body. As noted in his book, Form and Function:
The Anatomy of Motion
, Evan Osar states that ineffective load
transfer often leads to biomechanical dysfunctions manifesting as
increased compressive loads on the spine and skeletal structures,
an increase in tensile loads on the soft tissue structures, a
resultant decrease in daily, occupational and/or athletic
performance and, commonly, pain.

Needless to say, the ability to perform daily activities such as
walking, picking up groceries, throwing a ball, or performing a max
squat all require that the nervous system is efficient at
transferring force through the body using a system of "chains." One
such chain is the posterior oblique chain, consisting of the glute
maximus, thoracolumbar fascia, and the latissimus
dorsi.

Posterior Oblique Chain

The thoracolumbar fascia serves as an intermediary "attachment"
between the glute and the contralateral latissimus dorsi which then
helps to transfer force between the lower and upper body.
Additionally, as Eric Cressey noted in his article Lats: Not Just
for Pulldowns, this
serves as a crucial factor in spinal stabilization during loaded
exercises such as squats and deadlifts.

P is Psoas Activation

After listening to Mike Boyle and conversing with Mike Robertson
on this topic, I've come to the realization that many people need
to pay more attention to some direct psoas activation as part of
their warm-up. Especially when one demonstrates a posterior pelvic
tilt (ahem, "computer guy") or has a history of chronic low back
pain.

It all comes down to length-tension relationships. The psoas is
responsible for hip flexion past 90 degrees and originates on all
transverse processes of all five lumbar vertebrae. When your psoas
is weak/inhibited, you can't achieve full hip flexion without
compensating by flexing your lower back forward; a big
no-no.

What Mike Boyle recommends is something called low-load
isometrics. There are several drills I like to use here, but one of
my favorites is supine psoas activation using a
band.

low-load isometrics

1. Start by lying on your back with your knees flexed at 90
degrees and a band around both feet.

2. Extend one leg while keeping the other flexed at 90 degrees
by resisting the tension of the band.

3. Hold for ten seconds and repeat for the other
side.

4. Perform three sets of ten-second holds as part of your
warm-up.

Q is for Quadruped Progressions

Keeping with the low back theme, not a week goes by where I
don't receive an e-mail or deal with a client who has a history of
low back pain. Usually, their pain can be attributed to the fact
that their hips are tighter than a camel's ass in a sandstorm.
Because their hips are so tight (thus, lacking sufficient
mobility), they'll compensate by forcing the low back to use more
range of motion than it's accustomed to. End result: low back
pain.

One of the best things to help fix this problem is to teach the
person to learn to stabilize their lumbar spine while working on
mobilizing the hips. A simple drill I like to use with beginners
takes place in the quadruped position.

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Here the stick gives instant feedback on whether or not said
client is compensating by using their lower back. If they arch
their back excessively, you'll see it. Likewise, if they rotate
their pelvis, the stick will fall.

R is for REP's

One of the nice things about being relatively "well known" in
the industry is that I know a lot of smart people. Occasionally
those smart people stop by to observe and talk shop, and as a
result, I can steal their ideas.

One such person is Mike Stare, a physical therapist and strength
coach located in New Hampshire. Like myself, Mike works with a lot
of young athletes and "regular Joes" who experience shoulder
problems. I like to pick his brain from time to time on what he's
doing with his clients to keep their shoulders
healthy.

One great movement I "stole" from Mike is REP (retraction,
external rotation, press).

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Here we get a lot of bang for our training buck working on
scapular stability (retraction) while also working on glenohumeral
mobility (external rotation).

S is for Synergistic Dominance

If one muscle is weak (glute maximus), then other muscles
(hamstrings) compensate in an attempt to maintain functional
movements. This concept where one or more synergists take over for
a prime mover is called synergistic dominance.

Chronic hamstring tears/strains are often a culprit of glutes
that are weak/inhibited. The glutes serve as the prime mover of hip
extension. Unfortunately, many people sit on their glutes all day
and thus demonstrate what's known as "glute amnesia." As a
result, the hamstrings have to work double-time to pick up the
slack. Once slow-pitch softball season begins, we seem to have an
epidemic of hamstring strains.

Take a little extra time during your warm-up and do some direct
glute activation work. A little can go a long way to prevent those
nagging injuries.

Synergistic Dominance

T is for Take Your Shoes Off

Want to instantly increase the amount of weight you can
deadlift? Take your shoes off.

Why, you say?

For starters, most people wear shoes that have a heel lift of
one to two inches, if not more. By taking your shoes off and
pulling barefoot, you're decreasing the distance the bar has to
travel. Basic physics.

Albert Einstein

Additionally, with your shoes off you're now able to pull
"through the heels," instead of the balls of your feet. As a
result, you'll recruit more of your glutes and hamstrings to help
out with the lift.

U is Undulated Periodization

The traditional resistance training periodization model is
commonly referred to as linear due to the gradually
progressive microcycle increases in intensity over time (every
three to six weeks). Undulated periodization has grown in
popularity over the years due to the fact that there are large,
daily fluctuations in the load and volume assignments. Rather than
making changes over a period of months, the undulating model makes
these same changes on a weekly, or even daily,
basis.

An example would include the following:

Training day 1: 4 x 6

Training day 2: 3 x 10

Training day 3: 5 x 3

For those who are looking for increases in strength, I've found
that most (read: not all) people respond very well to an undulated
approach. Not only that, but as Alwyn Cosgrove has noted, you never
get bored using this approach, because you're never doing the same
rep range or exercises twice in a row. For all intents and
purposes, undulated periodization just may be the perfect approach
for a vast majority of trainees.

V is for Very Low Calorie Diets

The topic of very low calorie diets (VLCD's) to increase one's
lifespan has grown in popularity in recent years. I think it's a
bunch of hogwash. Do me a favor: If you know someone who's
following a VLCD in the hopes of discovering the fountain of youth,
kindly take his or her address and forward it to me. I don't care
if I have to drive across the country and use so much gas that it'd
make Al Gore shit a hybrid car, it'd be worth it to knock some
sense into them.

Al Gore

As researcher Lyle McDonald noted in one of his research
reviews:

Most research on long term VLCD's has been done on
animals and doesn't necessarily equate to humans, since it's not
feasible to track humans over their lifespan.

Also, the later someone starts restricting calories in life, the
less impact it'll have on their lifespan. Unless we start
underfeeding our children, I highly doubt this trend will catch
on.

A caloric restriction of upwards of 65% would need to be
followed to get the full impact of a caloric restriction diet. As
McDonald noted, a male with a predicted maintenance of 2,700
calories per day would be expected to consume 1,350 calories a day
for extended periods. A female with a daily maintenance of 1,800
calories would have to subsist on 900 calories per day for extended
periods to gain any benefit from caloric
restriction.

Is it really worth it to live your life in constant hunger, cold
(a decreased metabolism lowers body temperature), and with very low
energy levels, only to increase your life by a few years, at best?
And who says those extra years are going to be "high quality"
years? Do you want to spend another two years drooling on
yourself? No one really knows the long term health
risks of very low calorie diets.

As an aside, I realize that VLCD's are common practice for those
who are looking for rapid fat loss in a short amount of time (photo
shoots, class reunions, etc.). Those are typically followed for two
to three weeks and I've no issues with that. Please note that the
above refers to long term VLCD's, so save the hate
mail.

W is Well Done is Better Then Well Said

With 2008 upon us, it's inevitable that people have made their
New Year's resolutions. I know I've made mine:

1. Get my knees healthy.

2. Play baseball again. I'm totally going to dominate the
over-30 men's league this summer.

3. Write my first e-book.

4. Accept the fact that Jennifer Garner will never leave Ben
Affleck for me.

Jennifer Garner

Whether your resolution is to get your butt in the gym more,
shed some fat, start eating breakfast every day, or to finally
deadlift 300 pounds, just remember that well done is better than
well said. Don't just talk a good game, follow through with it.

X is for Xenoestrogens

As has been mentioned several times on Testosterone since
1998, most recently by Dr. John K. Williams, xenoestrogens are
manmade chemicals that can enter the body and mimic the effects of
the female hormone estrogen. Yikes. Guess what? Heating your food
up in Tupperware may not be the best idea, since it's been
speculated that xenoestrogens are "leaked" from the plastic into
our food from intense heat. Double yikes!

Xenoestrogens

To combat this, your best bet would be to pack your foods,
especially those that don't have to be heated up, in glassware
instead. Sure it can be a pain, but it's better to be safe than
sorry and sportin' a bra.

Y is for You've Got to be Kidding Me (Nice
Legs?)

Not too long ago, I received an e-mail from a client of mine who
simply wrote, "Give me an example and/or a picture of a chick with
really nice legs. My mind is drawing a blank."

Apparently my client and a friend of hers got into a friendly
disagreement about what constitutes "nice legs."

I've no idea who Amy Winehouse is (other than she's some singer
from the UK who likes to smoke and get into fist fights with her
husband), but this is the picture that my client's friend sent her
saying, "I'd kill to have legs that look like this."

Amy Winehouse

Apparently she wants legs that look like wet noodles. I've seen
chickens with nicer legs than this. See what I did there? I said
chickens have nicer legs than Amy Winehouse. Ha!

So being the nice guy that I am, I dug into my "nice legs"
library and sent my client this picture:

Jamie Eason

This woman, fitness model Jamie Eason, actually looks like she
eats something other than crack andhits the iron. Not to
mention she obviously has superb fashion sense. Love the um,
necklace. Yeah that's it. The necklace.

Z is for "?"

In my first edition, I ended with some book recommendations.
Since I can't think of anything "manly" dealing with the letter Z,
I figured I'd include another list of recommendations. Some are
old, some are new. Either way, you should read them.

Girth Control, by Alan Aragon, has
probably the wittiest title for a book ever. It's loaded with tons
of fantastic research backed by Alan's common sense approach to
nutrition. A must have for any nutrition geek.

Girth Control

Athletic Body in Balance,
by Gray Cook will teach you how to spot andfix
asymmetriesin the body. Jampacked with programming
ideas dealing with corrective exercise.

Athletic Body in Balance

Destroying the Dogma, by
Alwyn Cosgrove. Learn to debunk everymyth perpetuated by
un-educated fitness professionals concerning fat
loss.

Destroying the Dogma

The No-Bull Muscle Building Plan, by Kelly
Baggett. I really like Kelly's stuff and his book is one of the
best books out there geared for those who've always struggled to
put on any appreciable mass. I wish I had this book when I was in
high school.

The No-Bull Muscle Building Plan

Starting Strength, Second Edition,
by Mark Rippetoe and Lon Kilgore. Unlike many movies, this sequel
is superior to the original. Every coach or personal trainer should
have this in their collection.

Starting Strength, Second Edition

Kinetic Anatomy,
by Robert Behnke is a nice resource for those who need an
introduction to functional anatomy, without all the sciency stuff.

Kinetic Anatomy

Any book written by Kurt Vonnegut,
because the man was a genius. Start with Slaughterhouse
Five
. Thank me later.

Kurt Vonnegut